An interview with... (closed)

The lights in the arena dim, before revealing with a spotlight a lone figure: el cartographer. He whips out a microphone and the rest of the arena gets a small amount of light, revealing two steel folding chairs in sitting position in the ring.

El Cartographer: "Here it is again with another segment of... The Ultra-awesome, International, Interviewing Dungeon!"

The crowd starts to boo softly.

El cartographer: "And just so you all know, I am recovering from Friday."

The crowd's boos start to get counter-balanced by cheers.

El cartographer: "And here comes the next guest to the dun-"

Suddenly, odd music with repetitive lyrics blast out all over the arena.

El cartographer: "Wait, what the ---- is happening?"

The musics stops abruptly as Detective Browfel walks towards the ring. The crowd goes wild.

El cartographer (sarcastically): "Oh, great, you're here."

Detective Browfel enters the ring, carrying a microphone. He walks up to el cartographer and stares him down.

Browfel: "Alwight, missy! Where were you on the night of time-"

El cartographer: "Dude, I was taken over at that time by Damien Darkness, idiot."

Browfel: "Oh... Well, I'm still gonna ask you a few questions."

El cartographer: "Here's a question: can you handle my style?"

el cartographer lifts Detective Browfel onto his head, lifts him up over his head

and slams him down hard while doing a frontflip executing devastating Cartographer Cruncher!!

El cartographer kicks Detective Browfel's body out of the ring before picking up his microphone again.

El cartographer: "Yeah, sorry timeface, your detective is a little busy at the moment, please leave a message after the tone... BOOP!"

The crowd laughs as the medical team quietly carts Detective Browfel away.

El cartographer: "So, for the REAL pris-, I mean, guest, here is... The Pittsburgh Mauler!"

El cartographer waves his arms dramatically at the entrance while sitting down in one of the steel chairs.

Symphony of Destruction starts playing over the loud speakers. Sparks are showering down off the Titantron as Mauler makes his way to the ring. He stops for a second to grab a mic from the roadie before climbing into the ring.

The Pittsburgh Mauler: "El Cartographer, have we met before??"

Mauler stops and thinks for a second.

The Pittsburgh Mauler: "Were you at that conference where they talked about all the various things you can upload into a GPS unit using Google Earth? Anyway, I am surprised that you asked me for an interview segment. I would figure you would want someone more colorful than myself. Anyway, ask away..."

ooc: Back to you El Cartographer. If you don't hear anymore from me tonight, I'll be back on probably Saturday during the day.

El cartographer laughs at Mauler's statement.

El cartographer: "Well, first, sit down. Nah, never mind... Alright, first question.

El cartographer pauses.

El cartographer: "I'm sure lots of fans around here would like to know what you've been doing lately... After all, you are the UNWA's poetry guy, right?"

(OOC: No, really, did I get you mixed up with someone else?)

The Pittsburgh Mauler: "Well, I've just been busy doing my own thing, writing poems, having matches, etc. The therapist that Leon sent me to has really helped me to appreciate life in a new perspective. When I first came to UNWA, I hated the world and all those who inhabited it. The therapist said that poetry would help me to overcome that hatred and it really has."

The ring announcer gets into the ring and hands Mauler a note. Mauler opens the note and starts to read it.

The Pittsburgh Mauler: "Really?? Sorry kid, I have to cut this short because I have to be somewhere. Go ahead and set up another interview next week and we'll talk some more if you wish."

Mauler quickly gets out of the ring and heads to the back.

ooc: If you want to add anything else, go for it. Otherwise, it is closed from my perspective.

el cartographer waves at the Pittsburgh Mauler leaving.

El cartographer: "See you."

el cartographer suddenly turns.

El cartographer: "And that concludes..."

The crowd gets louder.

El cartographer: "Another segment of..."

The crowd gets even louder, a phrase "look out" being heard.

El cartographer: "The Ultra-Awesome, International..."

The camera turns to see Detective Browfel entering the ring behind el cartographer, Band-Aids all over his face.

El cartographer: "Interviewing Dungeon!"

Detective Browfel taps el cartographer on the shoulder, but el cartographer elbows him in his already bandaged face.

el cartographer puts his rival's head beneath his arm grabbing him by his leg

lifting him up and making him fall to the ground head first performing a strong Fisherman DDT!!

DETECTIVE BROWFEL IS BLEEDING!!

el cartographer climbs the top turnbuckle

and dives toward Detective Browfel hitting him with his head, performing a strong Diving Headbutt!!

DETECTIVE BROWFEL IS BUSTED WIDE OPEN!!!

el cartographer grabs Detective Browfel's hair

el cartographer and lunges himself on the ropes

el cartographer raises his own leg

and hits the running opponent with a strong Big Boot!!

With that, Detective Browfel falls out of the ring, where the medical team quietly carts him away for the second time.

El cartographer: "And that's a wrap!"

The lights in the arena dim for five minutes before lighting up again, revealing nothing left in the ring.