Sparks come showering down from the Titantron and smoke fills the ring.
Symphony of Destruction from Megadeth plays over the loud speakers.
A lone figure wearing a welder’s mask and carrying a lit welder’s torch slowly walks towards the ring. He steps into the ring, turns off his torch, and pulls out a piece of paper from his pocket. He then grabs a mic.
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “I have a prepared statement that I would like to read to all of you. For those of you who don’t know me, I am Dolph Zig… “
Mauler looks closely at the paper.
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “What the… no, no, no, that’s not right. Who writes this stuff anyway?”
Mauler crumples up the paper and throws it away.
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “That’s some jabroni elsewhere. Let me try that again.”
Mauler recomposes himself and displays a smirk on his face.
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “For those of you who don’t know me, I am the Pittsburgh Mauler. I have come to UNWA straight from the streets of Pittsburgh where I was forced to live after the steel mills shut down. Having lived on the streets, I learned quickly that you need to do whatever it takes to survive. ‘Survival of the fittest’ is my mantra and that’s how I live my life. I’ll do whatever it takes to be successful, so if I have to take a shortcut or many shortcuts to do that, then so be it.”
Mixed crowd reaction
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “Wrestling is not a popularity contest so I don’t really care if you like me or not. My purpose here is to make a name for myself and my first stepping stone is going to be the Hardcore championship.”
Crowd boos
The Pittsburgh Mauler: “In the meantime, I am issuing an open challenge to all of the wrestlers in the back, especially the holder of the Hardcore championship. If you think you are tough enough to beat me, then come on down and prove it. I am not hard to find. As another famous wrestler once said, ‘To be the best, you have to beat the best,’ and the best reside here at UNWA. I plan on being the best, so all of you will be dealing with me at some point in time here at UNWA.”